Don’t Yell at Each Other in the Grocery Store

Date

My communication advice for everybody. Use your headsets. Nobody wants to listen to your phone audio. I mean Nobody. And it's rude.

Scenes from my life – because People in Hell Want Ice Water.

As soon as the Governor of California lifted the COVID closures of hair salons and nail parlors, I was first in line to get in and get glammed up.

But being away from people really made me less tolerant of them. I blame the Pandemic.

First stop, the hairdresser.

I was in, and the color was in my hair.

A man came into the shop for a haircut. He immediately began complaining loudly about President Biden.

Let me say I live in Northern California, near Sacramento. It’s more conservative here, politically than I like. But what the Hell. I’m here until I can pull myself away from my daughter and grandchildren.

The haircut man went on and on complaining because Trump lost. Then he said, “I guess Biden is going to give us all a lot of money!”

The hair color was kind of rolling down my face like Rudy Guliani when I reached my boiling point.

I wanted to scream. THIS IS YOUR TAKE-AWAY of the election? We have COVID, a Bloody, deadly insurrection at the US Capitol, No Vaccine distribution plan, and this is what you are complaining about. People are unemployed. Children are hungry. Yes, we need then it gets some help.

I didn’t say it; I didn’t want to embarrass my hairdresser. But here is my takeaway lesson on communications if something similar happens to you.  

If you are the man, don’t complain loudly about a political leader in the hair salon. Give us a break.

If you are me say, as nicely as possible, “I disagree with you sir, but its too beautiful a day to argue. Let’s leave it at that. And some people need the stimulus money.”

One to my nails, I get there, and it’s jammed but I have an appointment and my Lady, Lan is waiting for me. I settle in, get comfortable in my chair, get my diet coke situated nearby and she get’s going on my raggedy nails.

A rather large woman comes in, sits down in the waiting area and turn on her phone and begins listening to a right-wing conservative video praising Trump.

I can’t fricking believe it. First the haircut man, now the right-wing video woman. What the hell?

I was not the only one that was annoyed. The lady next to me mumbled, do you believe this woman?

She never turned the sound down. Never even looked for head phones. When I left the salon my head was throbbing,

Communication-

I should have nicely asked her to turn the sound down.

That may not have worked out well. People get mad. They are grumpy.

But I should have tried.

I didn’t.

My communication advice for everybody. Use your headsets. Nobody wants to listen to your phone audio. I mean Nobody. And it’s rude.

Finally, my last stop.

I decide to cook and produce a tortilla soup video for my cooking blog, Pinch of Mexican, so I head to the grocery store. 

I buy chicken, black beans, corn, jalapenos, tomatillos, stewed tomatoes, fresh corn chips, sour cream, cilantro, whole fresh garlic, and yellow and green onions. I have the rest of the ingredients I need at home. 

Shopping always makes me hungry. The soup is going to take a couple of hours to prepare and cook. 

This grocery has excellent pizza-by-the-slice. It’s the thin crust—my favorite. I decide to get a slice for lunch. 

I head to the deli department. I look at the pizza slices sitting under the heating lights.

There are two slices of cheese, a couple of veggie slices, but they look old and dry.

One of the deli workers puts a large bubbling hot whole pizza in a box for somebody’s take-out order. 

My mouth is watering.

I try to get her attention so I can order. 

I clear my throat. I say, excuse me.

She ignores me.

Finally, I say, “Do you have a pepperoni slice available for sale?”

“Do you see one here?” She snaps.

“When will you have a slice of Pepperoni for sale?” I ask without missing a beat.

“I have three more pizzas to make for other customers,” she snaps again.

She was having a bad day. Could I give her some lessons in better communications?

  1. Stop what you are doing and look a customer in the eye.
  2. Don’t answer a question with a question.
  3. Try to respond nicely to a question.

I decided to let it go. “I’ll have a slice of cheese,” I said.

She sighs, grabs a triangular box for one slice of pizza.

I say, “Please heat it?”

“They are HOT!” She snaps.

She hands me the box. 

Thank you, I offer.

She doesn’t respond.

I move on.

I regret now; I didn’t say something like, I’m sorry you are so overwhelmed. Or hang in there. 

My only excuse for not being kinder is that I’m not getting out much anymore. I’m losing my ability to chat with people who are rude to me. 

I blame COVID. 

We are all stressed out. We all Want Ice Water as we live through the Hell that is the COVID Pandemic.

We are distancing at the store. The lines are two to three people with their carts deep. 

I get behind an older gentleman with a giant mylar balloon in the shape of a train tied to his cart. He only has a couple of items to purchase, so I think I can get to my pizza all the sooner. 

The checkout clerk is finishing up, and the older man says, “We have one more item coming.” Please don’t ring me up yet.”

I sigh quietly. 

Why does this always happen, I think. I’m like the black plague of the quick checkout line.

The older man looks frantic. 

I worry he’s going to have a heart attack.

“My wife had to have Jicama, and there was only a large amount, and so the deli was going to get her a  smaller portion.”

I hope she didn’t get the pizza woman, I think. We will be here forever.

Now I think I can redeem myself from the haircut man, the loud phone video lady, and the pizza counter gal.

I say loudly because I’m at a far distance away; I’m not in a hurry, no worries.

The clerk says to me, “I’ll ring you up.”

“I’m not in a hurry; I repeat, shouting again. I want the man to hear, even if he is deaf. 

The clerk starts getting my items out of my cart. 

I say, “I can pay for the jicama and whatever else they need to purchase,” I offer.

I hope it’s not a car. 

Finally, an older but spry woman comes toward us waving a plastic container. 

“I’ve got the Jicama,” she yells excitedly.

The older man now yells, “Where the hell have you been, we are all waiting for you.”

“Who told you to get in line?” She screams back. Don’t get in line when I’m shopping! 

“We’re late! He screams.

“You are also an old fool.”

The clerk and I exchange looks.

He says, “Can I just finish with them?”

“Of course,” I respond.

The Jicama-Lady walks around to the front of the line, looks at all of us, and apologizes.

I say,  “I’m in no hurry. And I like your balloon. I guess your husband was in a hurry to get home and play with it.”

He says, “I’ve been putting up with her for 50 years.”

“The balloon is for our granddaughter.” Jiama Lady explains.

Here are my tips on the exchange between the couple.

  1. I’m glad I’m no longer married. But that is off-topic.
  2. Don’t yell at your wife in the grocery store.
  3. Don’t yell at your husband in the grocery store.
  4. Don’t get in line if your wife is still shopping.
  5. Try to joke more.
  6. Be kind and friendly to each other. Always.

I’m finally getting check out, and the clerk says, you are having a lovely day? Any plans. 

I’m making tortilla soup for my cooking blog I say, check me out Pinch of Mexican on YouTube.

I will, he says. 

“Do you need help getting to the car? The gal who bagged my soup ingredients asks. 

No,” I said. I need the exercise. And time alone with my slice of pizza.

It’s great to get outside.

 The sun is shining. 

It’s a beautiful day. I toss the chicken and veggies into the trunk but carefully carry the bag with the pizza into the car. 

I turn on the car. Open the sunroof and put on my favorite crime podcast.

I bite into the slice of cheese pie. It is as cold as an Alaskan morning. I start to get angry, then realize how lucky I am to be alive. 

And I think, you know, I love cold pizza. And I have ice water in my travel mug.

I’m Gloria Moraga. Talk to each other. One-On-One. We are all in this life together.  Be kind. Be safe. Please share and subscribe.

More
Political News

Scroll to Top