I love women. I really do. I love men too, but we women are something special. But we women are hurting right now—more than others. And I wonder, what is happening to us? We’ve lost ground professionally. And that’s not all.
Women.
Just think of all we do. How strong we are. How talented and creative. And how we nurture everyone around us. Not just our children, but our lovers and friends, as well.
Think of all we have endured through the centuries. And what we are dealing with now.
Acknowledge Your Favorite Women
Women and One-On-One Communication. If you have a woman in your life, let her know you appreciate her. I’m talking about a mom, sis, a wife, daughter, or a lady who does your nails, colors your hair, or just someone who supports you at work, or the woman who rings up your groceries.
Tell her you to value her. Talk to her. Have a conversation. We need to support each other more.
COVID Hurting Women
I knew from reading news online that Women were being hit hard by the pandemic.
The Gallup News website had a great page on women and how we are doing in 2020 and 2021.
It documents that women have been hurt or lost ground during the pandemic—more than any other group of workers.
https://news.gallup.com/poll/286268/single-moms-struggling-worldwide-particularly.aspx
Gallup Polls document that:
- Almost half of the single mothers worldwide (44%) struggled to afford food in the past year.
- In the U.S., 40% of single mothers worked to afford food; 27% could not afford shelter.
- The workforce has lost over 2 million women since the pandemic began.
This is from CNBC,
“One year into the coronavirus pandemic, women are not okay.
More than 2.3 million have left the workforce since February 2020, bringing their labor participation rate to levels not seen since 1988, according to the National Women’s Law Center. In December alone, women accounted for 100% of the jobs lost.”
We are not okay.
We are not okay.
How are you? I hope you are okay. Hang in there. Things will get better.
I wanted to write and post this episode in March. I had trouble writing it. I had way too much information crammed into it.
Because women throughout history ARE just fascinating.
Women in History
At one time, we were considered the property of men. We couldn’t inherit property. To get someone to marry us, our Fathers had to offer doweries. Wads of cash. Or in olden times, a cow, chickens or pigs. These were basically bribes to take the worthless daughter away from the house forever.
And the part in the wedding ceremony when the priest asks, “Who Gives this Woman?”
My father gave me away. As if I was property to give away, from one man to another.
I was happy he just showed up at the wedding. And he wasn’t falling down drunk. That came later. That is another story.
Women’s Clothes and Shoes
And look at the clothes we have worn. The corsets. The tiny shoes.
Corsets were worn by women –sometimes men – in the Western world from the 16th to the early 20th century, although corset-like garments can be traced back to 1600 BC.
And you can still find them now—modern-day corsets—the girdle.
And honestly, for my niece’s wedding, I fasted for a week, only juice, then wore a body-stocking girdle-like undergarment. I wanted to look good. Thin equals Good.
The things I have done to lose weight. Now I’ve just let myself go. With COVID and all, it’s just eat, eat, eat. Or, cook and eat, cook and eat.
Dieting, the girdle, looking thin are just a few of the torments we women put ourselves through, And yes, sometimes we are subjected to torture by others,
Massachusetts
A 17th-century law in Massachusetts announced that women would be subjected to the same treatment as witches if they lured men into marriage via the use of high-heeled shoes.
Those were the days when women had to get married. We don’t HAVE to do that anymore. But we still wear high heels.
Women in China
Speaking of footwear: how many shoes do you own? I have way too many. But because of my bad foot, I really only use two pairs. I trade them off and on off and on. I’ve got to donate them.
Chinese women endured 1,000 years of foot binding. I read this on the Smithsonian website “…the practice of footbinding makes it brutally clear, social forces in China subjugated women.”
Really?!
But here is the twist. China was the home of three great female figures: a Politician: Shangguan Wan’er (664-710), the poet Li Qing-Zhao (1084-c.1151), and the warrior Liang Hongyu (c.1100-1135).
Footbinding
All three women lived before footbinding became the norm. Those women were household names in China when they lived.
Sometime after their deaths, there was a transformation in China. And women were forced into footbinding, and girls were not considered valuable.
Footbinding came after women were famous warriors and famous poets.
Source: The Smithsonian:
https://www.smithsonianmag.com/history/why-footbinding-persisted-china-millennium-180953971/
What, I wonder, HAPPENED?
What happened to women to cause them to stop being warriors and be crippled with pain because of footbinding?
Women in Egypt
A similar historical occurrence took place in Egypt.
Egyptian Queens.
Who didn’t want to be an Egyptian Queen? Raise your hand. Nobody. Yup.
They are famous throughout history. Just to name two,
- Nefertiti (1370-1330 BC)
- Cleopatra VII (r. 51-12 BC)
Fast Forward to Now – Same Question
Again, I ask, What the Hell Happened?
According to USAID, The US Agency for International Development, Egypt ranks low in gender equity compared to other countries worldwide. The 2015 Global Gender Gap Index, which measures disparities between men and women across countries, ranks Egypt at 136 out of 145 countries worldwide.
https://www.usaid.gov/egypt/gender-equality-and-womens-empowerment
From Cleopatra Sitting on a Throne to Second Class Citizen
It’s not just China and Egypt, Women are at risk in the United States, and everywhere.
At least China and Egypt once had Women Queens and Warriors. The United States may one day elect a woman President. Maybe. We are not moving forward in this regard. I may be dead before a woman takes the oath of office in my country,
We lost jobs, our ability to feed our kids plunged us into Crisis.
One study shows that Food Insecurity Risks Greater for Women in COVID-19 Crisis
And Women’s well being slipped as their levels of stress and worry rose.
Ya! We are Worried.
I am a feminist. And proud of it.
I think some people misunderstand what feminism means.
Here is the definition: from Merriam Webster:
https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/feminism
Definition of feminism. “The theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes. Organized activity on behalf of women’s rights and interests.”
This is from Wiki:
Group of movements that define and defend gender equity, including equal rights for women and girls.
Group of movements that define and defend gender equity, including equal rights for women and girls.
Feminism is a range of social movements, political movements, and ideologies that aim to define and establish the sexes’ political, economic, personal, and social equality. Feminism incorporates the position that societies prioritize the male perspective and that women are treated unjustly within those societies. en.wikipedia.org
We know, if we read that this is true. What is wrong with that. Yet, some criticize Feminism. Joke about it laugh about it. Its easy to mock what you don’t understand,
And my desire to create open and honest discussions about how we communicate and why women fail. Or get pushed down.
Human beings have this great gift, a capacity to communicate with each other. Thanks to technology, I can write and record this podcast in California and listen to it anywhere in the world.
Cave Dwellers carved pictures on cave walls. Now we can touch each other lives from thousands of miles away.
That’s a miracle to me.
And yet.
Yes. There is a” And Yet!”
Many times we do not talk to each other when we are in the same room. We don’t really speak to the people who are closest to us. Because you voted for Candidate R, and I voted for Candidate D. Or you said my gravy is watery on Thanksgiving Day. You hurt my feelings.
Or, this one is mine; when our mom was dying, you didn’t visit her enough. What is enough? Mom asked about you and only you, and you didn’t see as often as sis and I. You were her favorite.
Your reason. I hurt too much to watch our beautiful mother die.
No. Shit!
We don’t really talk to the people we work with. We didn’t hire them. We don’t like them. Why should we spend our time or make an effort to talk to them?
I used to joke that I spent more time with my photographer that I was assigned to than I spent with family members, the people I love.
Stuck in a car working with mostly men that I really never talked to about anything important.
I was lucky; I worked with some great guys. All the men I worked with in Washington, DC, were wonderful.
We talked.
Our stories were great because we connected.
I wasn’t as lucky with photographers in Sacramento.
My point is: I know what it’s like NOT to talk to someone.
And I’m telling you right now, my friends. Talk it out.
It’s better when you talk it out.
I sat down in March to write a podcast episode on “Women, I Admire, and Why.”
I wanted to post this episode in March because March is Women’s History Month.
I’m late. I’m sorry. I care too much about this stuff. It is my passion.
But PLEASE TALK TO EACH OTHER AND THANK A WOMAN YOU LOVE.
For all we do. For all, we aren’t able to do. I’m Gloria Moraga.
Important Links
- The Smithsonian
https://www.smithsonianmag.com/history/why-footbinding-persisted-china-millennium-180953971/
- Amanda Foreman’s book “The World Made by Women: A History of Women from the Age of Cleopatra to the Era of Thatcher.”
https://www.dramandaforeman.com/books-by-amanda-foreman/the-world-made-women/C
Kara Cooney explains in her book, When Women Ruled the World: Six Queens of Egypt.
https://www.usaid.gov/egypt/gender-equality-and-womens-empowerment
https://news.gallup.com/poll/286268/single-moms-struggling-worldwide-particularly.aspx
